Autumnal Interlude

How beautifully leaves grow old.  How full of light and color are their last days.  ~John Burroughs


My favorite season of the year is here, although it’s always a bittersweet changing… for gone are the long, sweet days of Summer and coming quickly are the frosty, short days of Winter with fleeting light, bare branches and my breath caught in the frozen aire.

These weeks since I moved have to Georgia have been difficult and jumbled.  As simple a move I had thought it would be, seeing I have lived here before…it has proven to disrupt my familiar flow of daily existence and has brought disquiet to my soul.

I have tried to find a harmonious path through the days of the past several months, but to no avail.  I have misplaced my morning rituals of hot tub meditation and consoling of heart through quiet reflection, and in it’s wake I find myself in daily mental upheaval and emotional disarray.

The light of the sun falls late on this new place and I only have a small glimpse of the sky here.  Even though I found our home in the country greatly isolating, I had come to appreciate the great swaths of personal time which allowed me to ponder life in all it’s wonder and struggle.  Through this time I had come to find a private peace and inner balance that I had not known before… and now…cannot seem to regain.

My creative flow and writing have come to an abrupt halt.  My flow of positive energy and thoughts have dried up like an empty creek bed.  My zest for life and drive for personal development seem to have gone on hiatus and left no word on the date of their return.

I feel I should engage in a more jovial attitude and be in step with the world at large which seems to dance and celebrate this wondrous time of year, but that would be to deny my true state of mind and feign a happiness which I do not feel.

So… I am allowing myself a melancholy and moody stance without judgement or guilt…for my truth in these present days is a low-spirited and wistful manner, and this is just where I am.

Life is changing, the Seasons are changing…even the World seems to be changing…full of strife and revolution.

Thankfully I know without doubt that Autumn leads to Winter, and Winter once again to Spring…but where these other things lead has yet to be revealed.


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